On Friday, the 21st annual World's Ugliest Dog contest took place at the Sonoma-Marin Fair in Petaluma

Pabst . . . a Boxer-mix with a SERIOUS under-bite . . . was crowned the World's Ugliest Dog.  His owner was awarded $1,600.

Here he is.....



I don't think he's ugly!



 

Old-school astronaut BUZZ ALDRIN . . . (--the SECOND man to set foot on the moon) . . . has recorded a hip-hop track called "Rocket Experience".  And on top of that, SNOOP DOGG and TALIB KWELI are sending it up.

But first, there are two things you should know: 

One, FunnyOrDie.com is behind this . . . so it was all done in fun.  Probably to indirectly promote Buzz's new memoir, "Magnificent Desolation:  The Long Journey Home from the Moon", which hit bookshelves yesterday.

And Two, it's AWESOME regardless.

"Rocket Experience" is available NOW on iTunes.  And Buzz . . . going by his dope rap alias DOC RENDEZVOUS . . . even stars in a video for the song. 

The video was shot by "Charlie's Angels" director McG.  You can watch it, here . . .


Buzz Does Hip-Hop!


Love it!!!

LADY GAGA wore some kind of a PYROTECHNIC BRA during her performance at the 20th Annual MuchMusic Video Awards on Sunday night. 

--At the end of her performance of "Poker Face", SPARKS started shooting out of something that was rigged onto her breasts.  

--Here's a pic. . .

--And here's a video of Lady Gaga's entire performance.  The PYROTECHNIC LACTATION . .  . . doesn't happen until the very end of the video, so unless you REALLY want to see the whole thing, you can skip ahead to the 6:10 mark.

 

If there's been an emptiness in your life ever since KEVIN FEDERLINE went underground, then I'm about to lift your spirits . . . because someone else has stepped up to take K-Fed's place in your heart.

--LEVI JOHNSTON is no longer satisfied with the prestige that comes with knocking up BRISTOL PALIN.  He wants more.  He wants HOLLYWOOD.  Levi has hired a man named TANK JONES as both his bodyguard AND his manager.

Tank says he's currently fielding pitches for Levi.  They've received several entertainment-related offers, he claims, but haven't taken any yet.  Oh, and here's another thing Tank has done for Levi:  He's given Levi a brand new showbiz name:  RICKY HOLLYWOOD.

Seriously.

But Tank's most important job may be helping Levi accept the fact that show business is filled with GAY PEOPLE.  They're not actually saying that . . . but it's pretty obvious from the following story . . .

Levi, his mother and his sister went on "The Tyra Banks Show" a while back.  And Levi had to get his hair and makeup done.  It was NOT a pleasurable experience.  Luckily, Tank was there to remind Levi to RELAX.  Levi says, quote, "That was the worst.  I had some dude singing to me the whole time.  He was real happy.  Calling me 'baby' and all that.  I kept my mouth shut."

Tank adds, quote, "I told him, you're going to meet all different types of people.  Don't overreact.  Nobody's going to hurt you.  You gotta be accepting of all different types of people.  "You're talking about dealing with Hollywood?  You're going to really meet some strange people."

--I have a great idea for "Ricky Hollywood".  How about a reality show about his attempt to break into showbiz???  We could call it, "I'm a Homophobe . . . Get Me Out of Here!"

BTW, Here's a picture of Levi with a "Ricky Hollywood" T-shirt.  Are you praying as hard as me that these things end up for sale??? . . .

Wow.

 

Okay, I'm going to ask you a stupid-sounding question, but try to keep an open mind.  Ready?  Here goes:  How would you like to hear a HEAVY METAL version of that KATY PERRY song "I Kissed A Girl"?

--Not a snowball's chance in hell?  Yeah, that's what I said too.  But it's actually not bad.

--Some guy named Andy Xiong did it and posted it on YouTube.  He took the original vocals . . . then wrote, performed, and recorded a pretty sweet power metal backing.......

 

 
It'd be really nice to ignore all this "Jon and Kate Plus Eight" hysteria.  But if KATE GOSSELIN is more concerned with the reality show than keeping her kids HYDRATED . . . that's something we definitely need to call her out on.

There's a video making the rounds online, which appears to be behind-the-scenes footage from the filming of their stupid show.

While Kate and the kids are waiting to tape an interview, one of the girls begins whining about how she's thirsty and is feeling "dehydrated."  Kate just responds, quote, "Yes, me too."

So Kate asks the crew if she can have a bottle of water.  They hand her one . . . and she drinks it in front of the thirsty kid then puts it on the ground next to her chair WITHOUT GIVING HER DAUGHTER A SIP.  The girl even says, quote, "You're drinking it right in front of me."

 Kate tells her daughter she'll get her a drink AFTER the interview.  The kid says, quote, "You're really, really mean.  You drank right in front of my face." 

Then, Kate actually appears to have a change of heart.  She starts reaching for the bottle, but realizes that the interview is about to start.  So she tells her thirsty daughter, quote, "We can't right now, we're going on." 

--Here's the video . . .

Wow.  Talk about a parent who clearly doesn't have her priorities in the right place to raise eight kids.  This footage is supposedly from this past January . . . long before this show was the MEDIA SENSATION that it is now.

So if there's one positive side to the way the show has BLOWN UP in recent weeks, it's that maybe Kate has to be a little more civil and attentive to her kids, now that the whole freakin' country seems to be watching.

When "CHAZ" BONO finally, officially and biologically becomes a man, I have a feeling the first thing he's going to do is . . . HIS VERY SEXY GIRLFRIEND.

Chaz has been dating a girl named Jennifer Elia for a few years now, and she's pretty hot.....

This brings up an interesting question . . . are Chaz and Jennifer making an end run around California's gay marriage ban???

No, we haven't heard any rumors that they're planning to get married . . . but once "Chaz" is legally declared a man, no proposition can stop them from doing it.

And "Chaz" doesn't even need to be a man DOWN THERE to be considered male in the eyes of the law.  Often, the legal declaration is made once the he-she has begun taking hormones and had his-her breasts removed.

 

Convicted murderer PHIL SPECTOR doesn't get to wear a wig anymore, now that he's in prison.  Check out his latest . . . and probably LAST . . . mugshot

--along with some of his more interesting courtroom hairstyles . . .





What a cutie!!


 

Last Thursday, PRESIDENT OBAMA took a tour of the Great Pyramids in Egypt . . . after speaking in Cairo earlier in the day.

--Anyway, at some point during his excursion, Obama found a hieroglyphic on a pyramid wall of a man's head with big ears . . . which kind of resembled him.

--Take a look at Obama and this hieroglyphic here . . .





 

There are two types of people in the world - those who watch the Tony Awards every year, and those who didn't even know it was on.  If you saw it, great -- If not, you may have missed this:

--POISON was part of the opening musical number.  They performed "Nothing But a Good Time" with the cast of "Rock of Ages", which is a rock and roll musical starring former "American Idol" loser CONSTANTINE MAROULIS.

--At the end of the song, Poison was supposed to exit through the back of the stage, as some big part of the set lowered to the ground.  But Bret didn't get past it in time, and got SMASHED IN THE FACE, and was knocked to the ground.  Here's the video . .



--We don't know at this point if Bret was injured . . . but reports that his nose was broken are apparently untrue.
 

This weekend, SID and MARTY KROFFT watch as their classic, mind-bending '70s kids show, "Land of the Lost" hits the big screen.

--But another one of their (potentially LSD-influenced) Saturday morning shows, "H.R. Pufnstuf", is getting the big screen treatment, too.

--Sid and Marty . . . who are both in their '70s . . . are putting the word out that they want JOHNNY DEPP in the cast.  And check this out:  They want him to play the villain, WITCHIEPOO . . . a witch who's always trying to steal the magic, talking flute that Pufnstuf and a young boy named Jimmy are guarding from her.

Sid says, quote, "Johnny, no one asked you to do it yet.  But we're dreaming that you'd do it!"

Here's a quick video of Witchiepoo . . . for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about . .

OK, here's the Popsicle we were talking about on the show this AM.  There was a survey where they asked "Who is the Most Handsome man in world?".  Daniel Craig came in pretty high on the list.  Then we found this online!!

Here's the story:

In honor of National Ice Cream Week in the UK, Del Monte Superfruit Smoothies has sculpted a limited edition popsicle in the shape of Daniel Craig's nude torso. The frozen treat -- said to come in blueberry, pomegranate, and cranberry flavors and be under 100 calories each -- is the result of a poll of more than 1,000 women, the majority of whom wanted the image of Craig, emerging from the water in Casino Royale, immortalized.


And here's the Pic:




My question:  What is this Popsicle doing with it's hands?  Hmmmm?


 

Well, the economy's in the crapper....and you may be looking for work.  If you're desperate for a job, you might be tempted to make your resume look a little better than it really is.  Hey, EVERYONE lies on their resume, right?  Well, not quite.  In fact, 38% of workers say they exaggerate on their resume, but only 18% admit to actually lying.

But, does lying work?  NO.  In fact, most companies disqualify job candidates as soon as they find out they're being lied to.  So, if you're desperate for work, don't be dishonest.  Here (from CAREERBUILDER.COM) are four ways to make your resume stand out WITHOUT lying . . . 

#1.)  BE FIRST IN LINE.  One in five employers says they're receiving more resumes this year than last.  And a good way to make yours stand out is to be the first one in line.  Sign up for email alerts, and check the job postings every day.  Don't let someone else steal YOUR job. 

#2.)  USE KEYWORDS.  Some large companies use computers to review resumes.  They scan them for keywords and then rank them based on the words they find.  Some of the most popular keywords include "problem-solving", "customer service", "team building" and "bilingual".

#3.)  BE DIFFERENT.  43% of hiring managers spend a minute or less looking at each resume.  So, don't use the same tired old lines and clichéd phrases that everyone else uses.  In fact, an energetic and unique resume can get your foot in the door even if you lack experience. 

#4.)  FILL THE PAGE, BUT BE HONEST.  If you have a gap in employment, don't make up a job that didn't exist . . . but don't leave it blank either.  Be sure to mention any volunteer work you did or classes you took during that time.

Most people forget to include volunteer work and part-time jobs in a resume even if it better qualifies them for the job they're applying for. 

Good luck!


 

Thanks to Photoshop, you just never know what's real and what's not.  But it LOOKS like ZAC EFRON and VANESSA HUDGENS were approached by a fan while browsing in a PORNO SHOP . . . and they were kind enough to pose for pictures with her.  

Now, of course it might just be in the "adult" section of some generic gift shop, but here are the photos --you decide...

Legend has it that VAN HALEN once sent out a tour rider that included a request for M&M's . . . WITH ALL THE BROWN ONES TAKEN OUT. 

It's always been a nugget of rock lore that has never been proven . . . UNTIL NOW.

The Smoking Gun website finally got their hands on the infamous "M&M's" rider . . . which, apparently, was sent out on Van Halen's 1982 world tour. 

It rambles on for an ABSURD 53 pages . . . but under the heading "Munchies", the band listed, quote, "M&M's  (WARNING:  ABSOLUTELY NO BROWN ONES)."

They weren't trying to be jerks, necessarily . . . it was just a TEST.  Supposedly, the band has said that they included that line to make sure that the promoters were paying attention, and had actually combed through the entire rider.

So basically, if there was a bowl of M&M's . . . with all the brown ones removed . . . the band figured that the promoter had also meticulously taken care of the more IMPORTANT aspects of the rider, such as lighting, staging, security and ticketing.

For how specific they were about the color . . . whether it was a "test" or not . . . they did NOT stipulate whether they wanted the M&M's to be PLAIN or PEANUT.

Regardless, Van Halen also requested a few other bizarre items on this rider, including . . . quote, "herring in sour cream" and, quote, "One large tube [of] KY Jelly."  The Smoking Gun posted an 11-page excerpt of the rider online.  Here's the link . .

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/1211081vanhalen1.html

CLAY AIKEN'S newborn son now has a mom, a dad and . . . A SPECIAL UNCLE.  That's because Clay has found himself a partner!

The new stud in Clay's life is a man named REED KELLY.  He's a Broadway dancer who's currently doing the show "Wicked".  They met earlier this year when Clay was doing the "Monty Python" musical "Spamalot".

Clay recently returned to the show, and "sources" say Reed is one of the reasons why.

Here's Clay & his new Boy-toy:




Ain't love GRAND?

 

OBAMA'S SPEECHWRITER WAS PHOTOGRAPHED GROPING A LIFE-SIZED CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF HILLARY CLINTON: 

BARACK OBAMA'S director of speechwriting is a 27-year-old guy named Jon Favreau (--not to be confused with JON FAVREAU who starred in "Swingers" with VINCE VAUGHN, and directed "Iron Man".)

Anyway, it seems Jon was doing a little drinking at a recent party, and he was photographed groping a life-sized cardboard cutout of . . . HILLARY CLINTON.

Of course, the picture surfaced on . . . that's right . . . Facebook.  It was only up for about two hours before Jon took it down, and he hasn't commented on the situation.

But Clinton's people don't seem too upset about it.  In fact, considering Clinton's complaints about sexism during her Democratic primary battle against Obama, her office responded with a surprising level of humor.

After learning about the photo, they released a statement saying, quote, "Senator Clinton is pleased to learn about Jon's obvious interest in the State Department, and is currently reviewing his application."

Because we know you're curious, here's the pic:

As part of his parole stemming from a 2006 DUI arrest, Alexander, 27, was ordered to complete an alcohol education program.

According to court papers, a judge sentenced him to 10 days in jail Wednesday after he blew off a second appointment visiting the county morgue.

The judge also ordered him to readmit to a six-month alcohol program.

He's currently being detained at the Pitchess Detention Center in Castaic, California.

And yes...there's a great Mugshot - which is really what you wanna see, right?  Here ya go:



Stay classy, Jason!

 

I don't know about you, but I NEVER know how much to tip.  So, to help you seem smart and generous this year, we tracked down a list of guidelines to follow when giving out holiday tips. 

--Au pair:  One week's pay and a gift from your child.

--Regular babysitter:  One night's pay and a small gift from your child.

--Housekeeper:  Up to one week's pay and (slash) or a small gift. 

--Barber:  Cost of one haircut or a gift.

--Dog walker:  Up to one week's pay or a gift.

--Personal trainer:  Up to the cost of one session or a gift.

--Pool cleaner:  The cost of one cleaning to be split among the crew.

--Newspaper delivery person:  $10 to $30 or a small gift.

--Favorite Morning Show: Thousands of Dollars!!!


--Mail carrier:  Small gift ONLY.

--Doorman:  $15 to $80 or a gift.

--Yard worker:  $20 to $50 each or a gift.

--Teacher:  Small gift.  NO CASH. 

--You can check out the complete list of holiday tipping recommendations here . . .

http://www.emilypost.com/everyday/holiday_tipping.htm

John Mayer got into the holiday spirit this Thanksgiving by baking up a storm with his family.

He posted pics of Turkey-shaped cupcakes, a marshmallow cake and a three-dimensional pumpkin cake (made by his family) on his blog.  Here's the pie John made:




He calls it "Frosty at Dusk With Pipe"


 

TINA FEY IS FINALLY TALKING ABOUT THAT SCAR ON HER FACE: 

Here's that story we were talking about on the air.  Did you ever notice that Tina Fey has a scar on her face?  It's on her left cheek and she rarely talks about.  In the new issue of "Vanity Fair", however, she and husband Jeff Richmond finally reveal all about THE SCAR.

Jeff reveals that Tina got the scar when she was five years old.  She was playing in the front yard of her home in suburban Philadelphia, when a stranger just walked up to her and SLICED HER CHEEK with something sharp.

He says, quote, "She just thought somebody marked her with a pen."

He adds, quote, "That scar was fascinating to me.  This is somebody who, no matter what it was, has gone through something.  And I think it really informs the way she thinks about her life."

Tina tells "Vanity Fair" why she doesn't talk about the scar . . . quote, "It's impossible to talk about it without somehow seemingly exploiting it and glorifying it.

"It's really almost like I'm able to forget about it, until I was on-camera, and it became a thing of 'Oh, I guess we should use this side' or whatever.  Everybody's got a better side."

In case you've somehow missed it.....





 

WOULD YOU HANG AN ORNAMENT ON YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE THAT WAS MADE FROM . . . REINDEER DROPPINGS???

Let's be honest . . . a lot of Christmas ornaments are tacky pieces of crap.  But visitors to the Miller Park Zoo in Bloomington, Illinois (--about 125 miles southwest of Chicago), can buy Christmas ornaments that are LITERALLY pieces of crap.

That's because the gift shop at the Miller Park Zoo is selling Christmas ornaments . . . that are made out of DROPPINGS collected from the zoo's two reindeer.  Seriously.

According to zoo officials, the ornaments . . . which they call "Magical Reindeer Gem Ornaments" . . . are created from droppings that have been dried, clear-coated, and either painted or rolled in glitter.

The reindeer dropping ornaments cost $5 apiece.    Here's some pics....








I THINK the Poo is those things that look like berries. 





THERE'S A GERMAN CANDY COMPANY THAT MAKES "CHOCOLATE JESUS" FIGURINES:

Recently, a 54-year-old German guy named Frank Oynhausen decided that Christmas had become too secular and commercial.

So, in an attempt to restore some of the holiday's traditional religious values, Frank started the "Sweet Jesus" chocolate company, which specializes in making Jesus figurines . . . out of CHOCOLATE.  (So I guess the question here is:  Are these chocolate Jesus figurines sacrilegious . . . or sacri-delicious?  HI-YO!!!

Anyway, here's a pic..




MMMMMM...Chocolatey Son of God......mmmmmm

 

OK, just so you're prepared for the worst...maybe you want to print this out.  Here's what to do in case your turkey catches on FIRE thanks to your terrible cooking skills tomorrow . . .

#1.)  CLOSE THE OVEN DOORS.  Shut the doors of the oven and the broiler . . . and turn the oven off.  DON'T try to pull a flaming turkey out of the oven . . . you'll risk grease burns on your arms and face.

#2.)  OPEN NEARBY WINDOWS.  Smoke will probably pour out of the oven vent, so turn on the vent-fan above the stove (--if you have one) and open up the windows to help clear the smoke.

#3.)  WAIT FIVE MINUTES.  Obviously, ovens have been designed for high heat, so it should contain the fire without a problem.  Keep the oven door closed to avoid adding oxygen to the fire.

#4.)  SLIGHTLY OPEN THE OVEN DOOR.  After the five minutes is up, the turkey should have burned itself out.  Keep your face WELL AWAY from the oven when you open the door.  If it's still burning, close the door and wait a couple more minutes.

#5.)  REMOVE THE BURNED BIRD.  If the fire continues to burn for more than 10 minutes, call the fire department.  If it stops, take the turkey out.  Often, only the skin and fat will be burned, so you still might be able to salvage some of the delicious meat.

You're welcome!

 

I found this list online....pretty funny stuff......

On their journey around the international film markets, films have a habit of changing names, as local distributors target the flicks at their audiences. Sometimes, however, as this list shows, a new title doesn’t always quite capture the meaning of the original when it’s translated back into English.

CHINA

The Full Monty: Six Naked Pigs

The Blair Witch Project: Night In The Cramped Forest

As Good As It Gets: Mr Cat Poop

Boogie Nights: His Great Device Makes Him Famous (Genius. Just genius)

Leon: This Hit Man Is Not as Cold as He Thought

Fargo: Mysterious Murder in Snowy Cream

Austin Powers: Trump Card Big Liar

Deep Impact: Earth And Comet Collide

Knocked Up: One Night, Big Belly

Nixon: The Big Liar

Risky Business: Just Send Him To University Unqualified

Free Willy: A Very Powerful Whale Runs To Heaven

____________________

GERMANY

Airplane: The Unbelievable Trip In A Wacky Aeroplane or The Incredible Journey In A Crazy Airplane (depending on which translation you believe)

K9: My Partner with the cold Snout

Dragnet : Floppy Coppers Don’t Bite, or Yellow Coppers Don’t Bite (again, depending on which translation you go with)

The Parent Trap: A Twin Seldom Comes Alone

Die Hard: Die Slowly

Die Hard With A Vengeance: Die Slowly, Now More Than Ever

Dodgeball : Full Of The Nuts

Girl, Interrupted: Cuckoo (Succinct and to the point…)

Annie Hall: The Urban Neurotic

____________________

ISRAEL:

Knocked Up: The Date That Screwed Me

Superbad: Super Horny

The Naked Gun: The Gun Died Laughing

____________________

ITALY:

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind: If You Leave Me, I Delete You

____________________

FRANCE:

Fried Green Tomatoes: The Secret Is In The Sauce

Dirty Harry: Inspector Harry

Home Alone: Mom, I Missed The Plane

The Matrix: The Young People Who Traverse Dimensions While Wearing Sunglasses

____________________

SPAIN:

The Dark Knight: Night Of The Knight

____________________

PERU:

Knocked Up: Slightly Pregnant

____________________

MEXICO:

Juno: Juno: Grow, Run and Stumble.

Snatch: Pigs And Diamonds

Thelma and Louise: An Unexpected End

____________________

DENMARK:

Die Hard With A Vengeance: Die Hard: Mega Hard

____________________

HONG KONG

American Pie : American Virgin Man

____________________

ARGENTINA:

Grease: Vaseline

____________________

PORTUGAL:

Lost In Translation: Meetings and Failures in Meetings

Die Hard: Skyscraper Attack

Die Hard 2: Airport Attack

____________________

CZECH REPUBLIC

Bad Santa: Santa Is A Pervert

Hot Shots! : Warm Shots

____________________

FINLAND

Big Momma’s House: The Cop In Drag

____________________

JAPAN:

Army Of Darkness: Captain Supermarket (WTF?)

The Horse Whisperer: Held by Wind in Montana

Being John Malkovich : The Hole Of Malkovich

Mr Holland’s Opus: The Sunny Classroom

Jersey Girl: I Love My Dad The Best In The World

____________________

TAIWAIN:

Get Smart: Is The Spy Capable Or Not

--------------------

LATIN AMERICA:

Rain Man: When Brother’s Meet

A 530-POUND MAN IS SELLING A NAKED CALENDAR OF HIMSELF:

It's not uncommon for an attractive, young woman to sell a calendar featuring pictures of herself in various states of undress. 

But when an overweight man who still lives with his mother sells a "sexy" calendar with naked pictures of himself . . . well, that's something special. 

Enter "Chubby Mikey" . . . a 29-year-old guy from Memphis, Tennessee, who weighs 530 POUNDS.  That's right . . . 530 pounds.

According to Chubby Mikey, quote, "I feel sexy and attractive so that's the way I act.  I don't see why I can't pose for photos like any other male model." 

Of course, we know you have to see some of the shots from the calendar -- so here ya go:









You're welcome!


 

If you've got a date this weekend, I found these "tips" online that might be of interest to you:


FIVE WAYS TO STOP "SERIAL DATING"

A first date can feel like a job interview and a bad therapy session all in one.  And if you're a serial dater, you're probably sick of it.  So here are five things you can do to stop serial dating, and find the right person for you, right now . . .    
 

#1.)  KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.  Most serial daters don't focus on looking for the right person.  If you want a committed relationship, then consider trading a wild night with "Joe the Womanizer" for a cup of coffee with "Joe the Nice Guy".

#2.)  STOP LIVING IN A FANTASY.  Hollywood fairytales are romantic, but if you're desperately trying to live out those fantasies, you're making it harder on yourself.  Movie characters fall in love quickly and live happily ever after, but real life moves more slowly.

#3.)  STOP WORRYING ABOUT CHEMISTRY.  Most single women think all is lost if there's not an instant connection.  But couples who have an intense attraction right away might also be inclined to leave quickly when the physical chemistry wanes. 

#4.)  STOP LOOKING, AND LISTEN.  People always concentrate on how HOT their date is, but physical attractiveness isn't what's most important to a RELATIONSHIP.  If you listen to your date, you might just share an unexpected moment.

#5.)  GIVE IT FOUR DATES.  Don't expect to figure someone out in a few hours.  If your date's nice, why not get to know them better?  After all, who knows what could happen?  Though, if sparks still aren't flying by date five, you might want to move on.  

Have fun!


 

AND NOW, YET ANOTHER BIZARRE PICTURE OF AMY WINEHOUSE: 

No rhyme, no reason, no explanation . . . just yet another addition to the ever-expanding pantheon of bizarre AMY WINEHOUSE pics.  Enjoy . . .









IS THIS THE FATTEST CAT YOU'VE EVER SEEN OR WHAT???

There's a veterinary charity organization in the U.K. called PDSA which is holding a contest . . . to see how much weight EIGHT overweight pets can lose.

Anyway, SEVEN of the pets that are entered in the contest are dogs, and the other animal is a 13-year-old cat named Tinks . . . who weighs 24 pounds.......








 

NBC IS DEVELOPING A NEW SHOW CALLED "MAKING FRIENDS WITH BLACK PEOPLE": 

NBC is developing a new comedy series called "Making Friends with Black People", which . . . actually . . . is exactly what it sounds like.

It's a buddy comedy about two guys . . . one African-American and one white . . . who become close friends, but don't always see eye-to-eye . . . (--which is where the HILARITY kicks in.)  Naturally, their perspectives are regularly attributed to RACE.

The show is based on a 2006 book of the same name, by a comedian named Nick Adams, who will serve as a co-producer on the project.  Interestingly enough, Adams openly admits that the series will try to "capitalize" on BARACK OBAMA.

He says, quote, "From time to time, race bubbles up in the consciousness of the country and then dissipates.  Now, with Obama, people are talking about race a lot more.  We hope to capitalize on that and not let the dialogue die down.

"It seemed like a good opportunity to strike while the iron is hot."  (--As you might expect, it's too early to know when the show could make it on the air.)

This reminds me of a funny video I saw earlier this year . . . which PARODIED a situation in Oregon, where a committee was actually trying to help teach the city HOW TO TALK TO BLACK PEOPLE....

http://www.break.com/index/how-to-talk-to-black-people.html

That's it for now!

 

There's a new trailer online for the upcoming "Star Trek" prequel.  It looks pretty good.  Check it out . . .

--Click on "Trailer 2" at this link . . .

www.apple.com/trailers/paramount/startrek/



 

LINDSAY LOHAN and SAMANTHA RONSON were on their way into a Paris nightclub on Friday night, when an animal rights activist dumped an ENTIRE BAG OF FLOUR over her.

--The offender was apparently a member of PETA Europe . . . and Lindsay was targeted because she still wears real fur.  In fact, she happened to be wearing one that night.  Here's some pictures . . . of the chaos thanks to X-17...









The WORLD'S TALLEST MOHAWK!!!!!


On Friday, a guy from Omaha, Nebraska, named Eric Hahn set a new record . . . for having the world's tallest mohawk.

Eric's mohawk was measured at 27 inches tall (--or two feet, three inches tall) . . . which is THREE inches taller than the old world record (--which was held by a guy named Aaron Studham). 

Take a look at Eric and his record-setting mohawk . . .




and a picture of the old record holder, Aaron Studham . . .




 

HERE'S AN OVERHEAD SHOT OF SEVERAL TRUCKS PARKED IN THE SHAPE OF A TRANSFORMER

I have no clue what the purpose of this was, but if you're into Transformers, you should check out this cool overhead shot of a bunch of trucks . . . which have been parked in the shape of a Transformer robot. 

I know, you're thinking, "Uh, what?"  Just check out this random picture here . .






 

DID STEPHEN BALDWIN GET "HM" TATTOOED ON HIS SHOULDER . . . IN ORDER TO LAND A GUEST-STARRING GIG ON "HANNAH MONTANA"??? 

STEPHEN BALDWIN . . . a.k.a. The Born-Again Baldwin . . . was doing a book signing at a Christian bookstore in Tennessee on Monday.  And MILEY CYRUS showed up with her 20-year-old underwear model-boyfriend JUSTIN GASTON.

Baldwin, if you didn't know . . . and I'm sure you didn't . . . co-wrote a novel called "The Death and Life of Gabriel Phillips".

They took some pictures together, and in one of them, Billy is showing off a tattoo of the letters "HM" on his shoulder.  Check it out . . .

Now here's the kicker:  TMZ says the "HM" stands for HANNAH MONTANA . . . and Stephen got the ink so that Miley would let him appear on her show.  (???)

Supposedly, Stephen and Miley met last year at the White House, and Miley dared Stephen to get the initials tattooed on his body, and in return, she'd give him a guest spot.

Well, when Miley showed up at the signing, Stephen pulled up his shirt and showed her the ink . . . and she agreed to let him be on the show.  (--It sounds kind of pathetic, but supposedly, Stephen's daughters are HUGE "Hannah Montana" fans.)

I don't have kids, but I'm told that If you have young daughters, you probably IMMEDIATELY understand how a man could lower himself to such things.  Sad, but true.

 

HERE ARE SOME TIPS FOR HANDLING ELECTION DAY . . . IF YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER WANTS THE OTHER GUY TO WIN:

We love that people get so fired up about politics.  But what do you do if the person you wake up next to every morning wants the OTHER guy to win? 

Well, we tracked down a list of TEN tips to help you make it through Election Day . . . without totally screwing up your relationship. 

#1.)  Assess the situation.  Is one of you way more passionate about your candidate . . . while the other doesn't really care?  Acknowledge who feels more strongly . . . and figure out whether you'll be able to engage in real political discourse or not.

#2.)  Find common ground.  Even if you're on opposite ends of the political spectrum, chances are you'll be able to see eye-to-eye on at least one or two issues.  Try to focus on them.

#3.)  Establish boundaries.  Things can get seriously ugly when it comes to politics.  Recognize that . . . and set up a few ground rules to prevent your political conversations from getting out of hand.

#4.)  Show respect.  When you love and respect someone, try to remember that.  No matter how insane you think their political beliefs are, don't taunt or make passive-aggressive digs.  Seriously . . . that's not cool.

 
#5.)  Don't make judgments.  At the end of the day, you love someone for who they are . . . and most of those qualities have nothing to do with who they vote for. 

#6.)  Find distractions.  If you wanted to, you could talk . . . and argue . . . about politics 24/7 . . . but what's the point?  Find something to distract both of you . . . so you don't claw each other's eyes out.  (--And, yes . . . sex should do just fine.)

#7.)  Find your outlet.  If you can't talk to your partner about politics, find another way to express your feelings.  Talk to friends who are politically likeminded or write a blog.  Do whatever it takes so you don't go home . . . and pick a stupid fight. 

#8.)  Keep it out of the bedroom.  Your bed is for rubbing genitalia together. . . NOT exchanging your thoughts on MCCAIN'S plan for the economy.

#9.)  Make a plan for election night.  Let's face it . . . one of you is going to be happy, and the other isn't.  Go to separate election-watching parties . . . or keep an eye on the results from different rooms.  Either way, just be prepared. 

#10.)  Do a reality check.  You might have a great relationship in spite of your different political beliefs . . . or you might have major philosophical differences which make you incompatible.  Unless you really want to be miserable . . . you'd better figure it out.

HEIDI KLUM WAS A FREAKY HINDU GODDESS FOR HALLOWEEN . . . AND PINK WAS A CLOWN: 

HUGE props to HEIDI KLUM for not slutting it up on Halloween.  Heidi attended her own annual Halloween party as the Hindu goddess Kali.  Her costume is pretty amazing.  You can tell she really gets into this.

SEAL dressed up as some kind of warrior . . . I'd say he's a Hun or a pirate or something.  And PINK showed up as a non-sexy clown.  Check out the pics . . .

Celebrities can be just as lame as the rest of us.  GWEN STEFANI and GAVIN ROSSDALE went to a Halloween party over the weekend . . . in one of those cheesy matching "couples costumes".  He was bacon.  She was an egg.  Check it out . . .





 

KB TOYS HAS JUST RELEASED THEIR ANNUAL "HOT HOLIDAY TOY LIST":

If you can believe it, the holiday season is just around the corner.  Anyway, if you're not sure what to get your kids this year, KB Toys has just released their annual "Hot Holiday Toy List". 

--So what toys made this year's list?

--Black & Decker Junior Kid's Play Workbench

--Disney Princess or Sleeping Beauty Sound and Light Vanity

--My Happy Family Dollhouse

--Webkinz

--A seven-foot by seven-foot Inflatable Bounce House

--Radio-Control Grand Canyon Express Train Set

--"Hannah Montana" In-Concert Collection Dolls

--"High School Musical 3" Sing Together Dolls

--31-inch Acoustic Guitar

--"Super Mario" Action Figures

--Light 'n Sound Kitchen Center Playset

--Razor Scooters

--"Ben 10" Action Figures

--Bakugan Booster Packs

--Rubik's Classic Cube Revolution or Magic Puzzles 

I know what you're thinking . . . "I have NO IDEA what any of this stuff is."  Well, you can get more information on all these toys here . .

http://www.kbtoys.com/index.html

HERE'S A WEBSITE WHERE YOU CAN DOWNLOAD POLITICAL HALLOWEEN MASKS:

Are you looking for a cheap, politically-themed Halloween costume that will take all of two minutes to throw together?  If so . . . you're in luck.

We found a website where you can download and print out paper masks of JOHN and CINDY MCCAIN, SARAH PALIN and JOE LIEBERMAN . . . among others. 

You can download your political cutout mask here . .

http://www.ep.tc/intro-archive049.html



 

Just wanted to tell you guys that i live in Kansas City, MO and my school blocked mix 93.3 (that's the mix station here) so i went to google and searched mix and found you guys. You guys are great! I'm a sophmore in High School and i'm gonna ask my school if they can do the same with the whole buying parking spaces and customizing them because all we do is buy a pass then park wherever!! And by the way, my school starts at 7:20 (5:20 your time) and it's still JUST WAY TOO DAMN EARLY!!!!!!!

Thanks Brent!

WOULD YOU SIGN A PETITION TO HELP A SOLDIER BRING HER PUPPY HOME FROM IRAQ???

Last May, a 28-year-old Army sergeant from Minneapolis, Minnesota, named Gwen Beberg rescued a puppy . . . who she named Ratchet . . . from a burning pile of trash in Iraq. 

Anyway, Gwen is scheduled to return to the U.S. next month . . . but it's against Defense Department policy for soldiers to bring home pets that they adopted in the U.S. Central Command (--which is northeast Africa, the Middle East and central Asia).

That said, exceptions have been made . . . and an organization called Operation Baghdad Pups has gotten 50 dogs and six cats transferred to the U.S. in the last eight months. 

So what am I getting at?  There's an online petition . . . which has already collected 38,000 signatures . . . that you can sign to ask the government to allow Gwen to bring Ratchet home with her.  Check that out here . . .

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/2/clemency-for-ratchet

And you can get more information on Operation Baghdad Pups here . . .

http://www.baghdadpups.com/


 

Yesterday, we heard that ABC was remaking the '80s alien invasion miniseries "V".  And I found this video from the original, of the alien leader, Diana, eating a guinea pig.  Here's that clip again . . . 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VObQfWMgmIM

Now check out this picture of RACHAEL RAY stuffing her face at some food festival in New York City over the weekend, side-by-side with a picture from that video . . . and tell me she wouldn't be PERFECT for that role in the remake . . .





Oh...and we talked about San Jose's own Joey Chestnut setting another Competitive Eating Record -- this time it was Pizza.  We finnally tracked down a picture of Joey in action.  Here ya go:




Joey's the one in the middle.  Go Joey!







 

COURTNEY LOVE got skinny last year, and she's still skinny . . . even though she CLAIMS she's off drugs.  So how does she maintain her new weight???

Britain's not-always-reliable "News of the World" tabloid claims she had GASTRIC BYPASS SURGERY.  A so-called "friend" says, quote, "Courtney has always had problems with her appearance and is convinced she's ugly and fat.  Two years ago she had a gastric band fitted in Beverly Hills.

"Lots of doctors refused to do it because she was nowhere near obese, just a little overweight.  But eventually, she found one." 

Anyway, here are some before-and-after pics of Courtney . .

By the way . . . There's a rumor going around that some Australian artist was going to smoke KURT COBAIN'S ashes as part of a performance later this month.  It's not true.  The guy couldn't possibly have Kurt's ashes, because Courtney still does.

There were claims earlier this year that someone had STOLEN Kurt's ashes.  But Courtney's rep says that NEVER HAPPENED.

And Here's a bonus story for today!

According to the not-always-reliable "Star" magazine, RIHANNA was approached by screaming fans recently in London . . . but only because they thought she was PRINCE.  (!!!)

That's nothing to be embarrassed about, really.  It says more about how PRETTY Prince is than how UGLY or MANLY Rihanna is.  Either way, they DO share some physical similarities.  Check out this comparison pic . .

Pretty Freaky, huh?







 

Are you familiar with something called  "BIC Tattoo"?  Is that new, or am I just hopelessly out of touch?

The rumor is that  MILEY CYRUS is dating a 20-year-old underwear model (slash) horrible country singer by the name of JUSTIN GASTON???  Well, this might prove it . . .

It's a picture of Miley performing, with something written on her wrist in pen.  That something is . . . "JC + Miley = (a picture of a heart)".  Check it out . . .

We may have a new contender for Best...Mugshot...Ever!  For years, the Nick Nolte Mugshot:



pretty much ruled as the best, but that was then, this is now.

32-year-old Michelle Allen of Middleton, Ohio was just minding her business, urinating on a neighbor's porch while dressed as a cow, when cops told her to please go home. Later that day, cops were called once again as Allen was blocking traffic and chasing terrified children. It was at this point that cops went ahead and decided to arrest her.

The arresting officer says Allen smelled of alcohol, slurred her speech, and was belligerent. She also alleged cursed at the officer.
Allen told cops that if they took her to jail, she would "cause problems."

By the way, she did manage to put on regular clothes for her court hearing, but not before leaving us with what may be the finest mug shot in the history of the world.

The part I love is that the report makes it clear to mention that, "It is not clear why she was wearing the costume"


 

Well, it looks like pictures from HEATHER LOCKLEAR'S DUI arrest on Saturday night have hit the World Wide Web of Embarrassing Photography. 

First off, in case you haven't seen it,  here's the Mugshot:

--They even caught her taking the breathalyzer and a field sobriety test,

Then being CUFFED AND STUFFED.  Check these out . . .

Meanwhile . . . there were talks that something INAPPROPRIATE went down during Heather's arrest, because one of the cops was taking pictures of her on his personal cell phone.

People were speculating, obviously, that he was taking the pics for personal use, and might even try to SELL them later.

This is NOT true.  It turns out that he was taking pictures and video for EVIDENCE . . . and he was only using his cell phone because the camera he would normally use was broken.

According to online gossip columnist Janet Charlton, "Heather is well liked in Hollywood and everyone hopes she'll finally get a grip on this problem."

DO THE SIGNS ON BATHROOM DOORS NEED TO BE MORE POLITICALLY CORRECT???

Look . . . I understand that there can be some value to political correctness . . . but this is just ridiculous.

Over the summer, officials at Manchester University in England replaced the signs on the student union bathroom doors . . . to say "toilets with urinals" for the men's room, and just "toilets" for the women's bathroom.  So why did they do it?

Apparently, it's for the benefit of the school's transgender students.

According to one school official, quote, "Transgender people can face violence and abuse when they go into toilets and we wanted to provide a place where they can feel comfortable." 

Just so you know what we're talking about - here are the signs:

Good Morning Bill / Marla,

 OMG!  This poor girl is just throwing her life away.  The pictures up on your blog of Amy are just horrible, what is she thinking/doing!

 Now here’s something you might want to add to your blog – take a look at her before and after photos.  Amy was a nice looking woman with a great body that men would die for and now look at what she has become!  Pretty sad! 

And includes this before/after (or actually after/before) pic:



Thanks Leslie!

Ladies, Cosmo says you can tell if a guy is "into you", just by watching his body language!



If he lifts his Eyebrows:

When a man sees someone he likes he'll automatically raise and lower his eyebrows. Keep your eyes peeled to catch this telltale sign. Anthropologists call it the eyebrow flash because it's usually lightning fast.

If he touches his belt or front pockets:

When a man touches his belt, puts his hands in his front pockets, or even scratches "down there," you may need to hose him down. He is subconsciously trying to draw your attention to his umm....assets.

If he positions his chest and shoulders toward you, even though he may be looking somewhere else:

Whether it's you, your best friend, or the keg in the corner, whatever a guy aims his upper body at is the most meaningful thing in the room to him.

If he stands with his legs apart:

A guy will often stand with his legs spread apart and his pelvis facing you if he's into you. It's a primal, biological instinct and he isn't even aware that he is doing it.


 
 

Really Funny!

Do you ever watch "The Soup" on E! over the weekend?  Some of the funniest stuff on television!  Anyway, this weekend, they ran something that made me laugh harder than I have in a long time.  Thank God for TIVO, I watched it over & over, and laughed hysterically each time.  Please to enjoy, Cat Eating Spaghetti:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMyHuCVaRaE



Boy Bands

We talked about this last week, and got a couple of emails on it.  Rosemarie writes:


Hi Bill and Marla!

I can't find that list anywhere in the web but I gotta know if my favorite boy band made the list. They are called Westlife, an irish boy band that is so big everywhere else but U.S. Those guys are so goodlooking!


So in case you missed it, from Entertainment Weekly, here's the whole list:


20.)  (Nickelodeon superstars) The NAKED BROTHERS BAND

19.)  (The Irish boy band) WESTLIFE

18.)  DAY26 . . . (--from DIDDY'S "Making the Band 4".)

17.)  LFO . . . (--a.k.a. The LYTE FUNKY ONES!!!)

16.)  (ROBBIE WILLIAMS' British boy band) TAKE THAT

15.)  GOOD CHARLOTTE . . . (--If you're surprised to see them on a boy band list . . . just think about it for a minute:  JOEL MADDEN is dating NICOLE RICHIE . . . and his twin brother BENJI is dating PARASITE HILTON.  Enough said.)

14.)  B2K . . . (--a.k.a. BOYZ 2 KOOL!!!)  (--OMARION was in this group.)

13.)  (The MTV creation) 2GE+HER . . . (--pronounced "together", of course.)

12.)  O-TOWN . . . (--from the first season of DIDDY'S "Making the Band".)  (--ASHLEY PARKER ANGEL was in this group.)

11.)  98 DEGREES . . . (--with NICK and DREW LACHEY.)

10.)  THE MONKEES

9.)  BOYZ II MEN

8.)  The JONAS BROTHERS

7.)  MENUDO . . . (--Apparently, all of the Menudo incarnations . . . collectively.)

6.)  (BOBBY BROWN'S boy band) NEW EDITION

5.)  The BACKSTREET BOYS . . . (--Now, minus KEVIN RICHARDSON.)

4.)  HANSON . . . (--a.k.a. the ORIGINAL "Jonas Brothers".)  (--Except with Hanson, the littlest one was the LEAST talented brother.)

3.)  NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK . . . (--who are now back . . . and approaching their 40s.)

2.)  'N SYNC . . . (--which, obviously, featured JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE.)

1.)  THE JACKSON 5 . . . (--which, obviously, featured MICHAEL JACKSON.)

That's it for now....

 

MOVIE STUFF


Saw Dark Knight over the weekend...liked it alot.  I DID think it was a little long though (2.5 hrs).  And too violent for a PG-13 rating.  Moms & Dads - go see it yourself before you take the 8-10 year olds.  Anyway, we saw the trailer for the new Terminator movie.  Looks interesting.  It looks like ARNOLD won't be appearing in it after all.  Bodybuilder ROLAND KICKINGER has been hired to play the T-800 Terminator . . . which is what Arnold played in the first three movies.

Just like Arnold, Kickinger was born in Austria, and went on to become Mr. Universe.  He has trained with Arnold, and even PLAYED Arnold in the 2005 TV movie, "See Arnold Run".  You can check out his website here . . .

http://www.kickinger.com/

Kickinger says, quote, "There's a very strong scene in the film where John Connor for the first time meets the Terminator, and he doesn't know if he's a good guy or a bad guy.   "It's Arnold's character in the first 'Terminator'.  That's basically my role, but 20 years before, so it establishes how the Terminator came about."

WILL THERE BE A SEQUEL TO "TOP GUN"??? 

Believe this if you want to:  The not-always-reliable British tabloids say that TOM CRUISE has been approached to star in a "Top Gun" sequel.

It would take place 22 years after the original, with Tom's cocky pilot trainee Maverick now a flight instructor.  But the tables are turned on him when he has to deal with a cocky new female fighter pilot.

GARY BUSEY IS STILL INSANE

Do you love Gary Busey as much as I do?  A company called GotVMail has come up with what could become the most brilliant ad campaign of all time.  It's GARY BUSEY . . . sitting in a chair . . . talking.   Start watching here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amIh-Jovulw

But be warned, once you start, you won't be able to stop. 

That's it from here!

A small boy is sent to bed by his Father.  Five minutes later:
"Da-aaad"
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water?"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'm going to have to spank you."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaad..."
"When you Come into Spank me can you bring a drink of water?"


One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed.  She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"  The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug.  "I can't dear," she said.  "I have to sleep in Daddy's room."  A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."


One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class.  She came to the part where Chicken Little warns the farmer.  She read, "...and Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, 'The sky is falling!'"  The teacher then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"  One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Sh*t!  A talking chicken!'" The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

 

SOME MORON PAID $6,000 FOR A STUPID, GOLD-PLATED IPHONE:

Depending on which "expert" you ask, the U.S. either is or isn't in the middle of a recession.  But that doesn't mean there aren't idiots out there who are willing to throw away their money on pointless junk like this . . .

Apple iPhones generally retail for about $500.  But on Tuesday, an Apple iPhone sold on eBay for $6,000.  The only difference between this iPhone and any other iPhone . . . is that THIS one has a thin layer of 24-karat gold on its exterior.

(--So you know, the current price of gold is about $900 per ounce . . . which is actually extremely high.  Even so, there'd have to be almost a half-pound of gold on this phone to make it worth the price this idiot paid.)

That means some moron overpaid by $5,500 . . . for a stupid gold phone which is probably going to be completely outdated in six months anyway.  

Here are the pics:








Paula Abdul's Blackberry

Got this in the email this AM.  American Idol may be over, but the fun never stops for Paula Abdul.  Want Proof?  Here's a copy of her Blackberry Calendar for today:


--8:00 A.M.:  Wake up.  Confusion sets in.

--9:00 A.M.:  Apply one coat spray tan, one coat CRAZY.

--9:30 A.M.:  Feed, groom MC Skat Kat.

--10:00 A.M.:  Pick out dress that adequately distracts viewers from my stupidity.

--12:00 P.M.:  Drive-thru at Arby's.  Ask Dunkelman if he still thinks leaving "American Idol" was a good career move.

--1:00 P.M.:  Call up Clay Aiken and try in vain to get him to return my Gucci handbag.

--3:00 P.M.:  Drop off clothes at dry-cleaners to get rid of Randy Jackson "bacony smell".

--4:00 P.M.:  Drink Coke in public.  Make sure everyone sees the logo.

--5:30 P.M.:  Switch Chihuahua to other arm.

--7:00 P.M.:  Critique the dinner that I haven't even eaten yet.

--10:00 P.M.:  Bedtime.  Confusion subsides.


That's it for now....see ya tomorrow!

Courtney Love is a Freak

Oh you'll love this!  Courtney Love just gets out of the hospital right after being diagnosed with strep throat. . BUYING CIGARETTES.  Given her delicate condition, though, she went with Marlboro LIGHTS.  After buying her smokes, she proceeds to just RAMBLE as usual . speaking in that special language that only Courtney understands. .

http://www.tmz.com/tmz_main_video?titleid=1534611557

 
Dancing with the Stars Romance

Still need proof that former "Dancing With the Stars" partners SHANNON ELIZABETH and DEREK HOUGH are doing it???  Here's another picture of them kissing . . .

10 MOVIES THAT SHOULD NO LONGER BE CONSIDERED CLASSICS: 

MSN MOVIES has put together a list of 10 movies that are considered all-time classics but . . . for various reasons . . . should be REMOVED from the "classics" list once and for all.  Here they are . . . what do you think?

#1.)  "Gone With the Wind",  1939

#2.)  "Giant",  1956

#3.)  "Easy Rider",  1969

#4.)  "The Ten Commandments",  1956

#5.)  "The Seven Year Itch",  1955

#6.)  "Gentleman's Agreement",  1947

#7.)  "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner",  1967

#8.)  "All the King's Men",  1949

#9.)  "Arsenic and Old Lace",  1944

#10.)  "Love Story",  1970

WOULD YOU PAY $50,000 TO MEET THE NEXT PRESIDENT?

Every year, the people behind the Robert F. Kennedy Memorial auction off a bunch of pretty cool stuff for people with a ridiculous amount of disposable income. 

--Here are the ten best things you can bid on before the auction closes on Wednesday (May 7th) and their current bids:

#10.)  For $37,000, you can share a scene with JOHNNY DEPP in the upcoming movie "Public Enemies" as a 'featured extra' . . . which means you don't have any lines.

#9.)  You can get a private, one-hour tennis lesson with ANDRE AGASSI for $75,000.

#8.)  $18,500 gets you tea at the Four Seasons with ALAN GREENSPAN . . . the former Chairman of the Federal Reserve.

#7.)  Or, you can meet OPRAH after sitting in the VIP section during the taping of her show . . . for $14,500.

#6.)  $2,050 is how much it'll cost to meet up with BARBARA WALTERS after a taping of "The View".  (--Unfortunately, that might also involve meeting ELISABETH HASSELBECK.)

#5.)  Also for $2,050, you can meet OWEN WILSON at the L.A. premiere of his new movie "Marley And Me".

#4.)  One of the cheapest things you can bid on is a meeting with DIANE SAWYER during a visit to the set of "Good Morning America".  Bidding is only at $1,350.

#3.)  You can have dinner for five in the private wine cellar of STEVE FORBES' New York townhouse for $3,750.

#2.)  $850 will get you the dress SHARON STONE wore to the premiere of "Basic Instinct" in 1992 (--back when she was still hot).

#1.)  And how'd you like to be in Washington for the inauguration of our next president?  You get VIP sitting during the ceremony . . . go to a bunch of balls and functions . . . and you get to meet the next president . . . all for only $50,000.

--But at least it's for a good cause:  The auction benefits international human rights.

---You can Bid Here.....

Spring Ka-Ching

Big Congrats to our first $2000 Spring Ka-ching winner the AM, Chris Frechette!  Way to go!  Chris didn't believe his wife when she called him to tell him his name had been announced.  I'm not een sure he knew his name had been entered.  You can bet the wife will be grabbing the check the minute it hits the mailbox!  Anyway, names at 8AM, 1 & 4PM every Thousand-Dollar-Thursday.


Other Stuff

Here's todays; disgusting factoid:  Some of the discontinued flavors of Jell-O include celery, mixed vegetable and seasoned tomato.  Wow.  Can you imagine...they didn't sell?

Did you hear this?  

Paula Abdul is a HUUUUGE Dancing With the Stars fan!  Apparantly is looking to get on the show!

----> Why?  Was Season two of "Dr. Drew's Celebrity Rehab" all filled up?

And a coupla Pics

A dog lifted its leg and peed on Natalie Portman on the streets of New York.  




Natalie barely took notice, because what you don't see is she was dealing with a homeless guy peeing on her other side.

And now, it's time for our new fun Blog game, "What is Dave Navaro Making out With?"

If you've got any ideas, drop me an email.

That's it for now!  More next week!

 

Great Video

People with waaaay to much free time on their hands:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJEXCMvhGRg

Google Street Level

We were talking about Google Maps the other day, and somebody called in about Google Street level view...where you actually get a street level look at the area you select instead of the "birds-eye" satelite thing.  Our caller thought it was a little "creepy", and I can see her point....it's almost like you're being watched all the time.  But it does have it's good points.

Jenifer sent us an email that says:

Yes, Google does drive around and videotape whole blocks of streets for their STREET VIEW service. They do this not to "creep people out," however. The idea behind it, from what I understand speaking with their company, is to provide vital informational services to companies or individuals looking at specific addresses. If you can see a snapshot of a property at a specific timeframe, you can get a better idea of its usage at that time, can gauge its approximate value, and can determine if the statistics you've been given about the property (on a real estate website, for instance) is an accurate description, or if it's little more than a clever marketing fabrication in an effort to quickly sell the place.

Michael Says:

The street view is old news. It is not creepy. What is true, the people that are creeped out at stuff like that no one would ever care what they are doing.

Street view is nice because if you are looking for a business or thinking of moving to an area to live, you can see the area without having to drive all the way over there. It is nice.

American Idol

Bye Bye Kristy!  Let's face it, you knew she had to go sooner or later.  I feel bad about the horse thing though.  In case you missed it, she had to sell her horse to get the money to get on the show, and now that she has enough money to buy it back, the guy she sold it to, won't sell it back to her.  What a putz.  I'm guessing he's just gonna hold out for more money.  

My prediction is, some Country music Superstar is gonna step in, offer the guy a million dollars for the horse, and give it back to her.  Great PR stunt, and big smiles all around.  We'll see.

Tomorrow on the Show

Have you seen the trailers for "88 Minutes"?  Looks like it could be VERY suspenseful.  Howie, our "Jew-Doing-a-Movie-Review" will be with us in the 9am hour to give us his take.

We get emails:

Well, I gotta give major credit to Rhonda who wrote me the "hate" email a few weeks ago about my comments about Adam Carolla calling one of the judges on "Dancing with the Stars"  a "bitch".  The other day, I got this in the ol' email bag:

Hello Mr. Kelly,
 
A couple of weeks ago I e-mailed you and told you were wrong in reporting that Adam Corolla called Carrie-Ann a bitch on DWTS. However I am writing to you to apologize and to let you know I was wrong. He did in fact use the b-word.  My sincerest apology and I hope you enjoy the rest of your week!
 
Sincerely, Rhonda

Very Classy Rhonda!  Thank you!

Gas Prices:


Talked to somebody today who paid $175 to fill up her SUV with Diesel yesterday.  A-freakin-mazing.  Eden sent this by email:

And a Couple Great Links for you to check out:

1) The dangers of being a TV reporter (caution: Contains an F-Bomb or two - may not be safe for work)

2) Ladies, before you go nuts trying to lose more weight, check out this list of  "Ten Skinny Ass Ladies Who Used to be Hot"